White Christmas: snow vs. sand

‘Tis the season to be jolly. But who said you had to spend Christmas sipping super-hot cocoa while skiing with friends? Why not sip an ice cold beer while waterskiing off a white-sand beach? Because its just as dangerous.

If I had things my way, instead of gathering around an open fire and Christmas trees, children would gather around the ocean’s edge waiting for Santa, who they’d affectionately call “Manong Poy-Poy,” loosely translated as “Red Fat-Ass.”

Instead of your conventional western sleigh and reindeer, Manong Poy-Poy would ride a small boat propelled by 6 tuna fish and the beloved Rude-dolph the red-nosed-dolphin. Contrary to popular belief, Rude-dolph is actually quite well-mannered and loves kids (between the ages of 2 and 4. You know, the cute years).