How to unlearn Mahjong. Sorry, you can’t.

I hate you mahjong. Thanks to you I can’t walk the streets without trying to pong someone’s twin sister. For years i’ve watched my aunts and uncles play your evil, devil, game, betting their precious dollars away as your tiles stood erect, facing them with their white faces and Chinese characters I did not understand, but yet called to me as if they were inanimate mahjong tiles calling me.

And because of my curiosity, this cat has not only been killed, it has been resurrected into a Mahjong-playing cat. And now the younger ones in our family are addicted to your ambrosia of squareness, why? Why? They’re so young! Take me instead, take me.